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 I just finishing reading a new book written by the child of a lesbian parent.  Troy Johnson’s new book “Family Outing” is definately on my list of “must read” books for GLBT parents or prospective parents. 

Though not your typical “How I learned to love my lesbian mom” story, Family Outing has much to tell GLBT parents about what goes on inside the head of a confused, struggling teen when he finds out his mom is gay.  Though it speaks to all of our fears that there may be troubled water under the seeminly calm surfaces of our children’s psyches, it is important for us to face those fears in order for us to guide our kids out of the darkness and into the light of open communication.  That is probably the biggest message of Family Outing, communicate with your kids.  And when you think you’ve communicated and talked enough, communicate some more.  Many of the struggles Mr. Johnson had in growing up were the creation of unanswered questions and dramatic conclusions created inside of his own mind.

There’s no doubt that growing up with a GLBT parent poses it’s own set of unique challenges to our kids.  It’s up to us as parents to make sure these kids aren’t having to answer the questions that come up on their own.  We all know that when we ask our kids how they’re doing, the easy and most common answer is “fine”.  We have to know better and probe deeper in more creative ways to get to the emotions and fears that are lying behind that one word answer. 

Family Outing tells the story of the angst-filled teen years of a young man coming to terms with having a lesbian mother.  To make matters worse, the way he found out his mom was gay was less than ideal for any kid.  The cards were stacked against him having a healthy, open relationship with his mom.  Family Outing details his journey from that place into one of more open acceptance and understanding.  Beneath all of the pain and acting out, however, is simply a kid who loves his mom and wants to feel safe.  It’s a theme we can all identify with.  Family Outing is very well written and humorous.  The author has a fresh, sarcastic way of communication, and in telling his own story he comments on society at large, our strengths and our shortcomings. 

It’s a great read, and has much food for thought for the GLBT parenting community.